Friday night I called my best friend to tell her about my ex’s engagement and she says “That’s so weird. How can you marry someone who’s bisexual?”. I asked her to clarify what she meant. She said “[ex's name] is bi. Didn’t you know that?” What??? Hell no I didn’t know that. So I asked how she knew and she told me he added her to his facebook the other day and it said he was listed in a relationship and that he was interested in men and women.
The only thing that came to mind was when I googled his email address about 3 years ago (yea I was curious what he was up to) and I discovered his profile on some casual sex encounters website where he had a profile with his photo and he had put down that he was interested in anal sex and threesomes. I assumed he meant anal sex with females and the threesomes I assumed were 2 females and himself, so I just sorta rolled my eyes at it and tried to wash it out of my head. But now it all makes sense.
I honestly feel like Mike and I are going no where. We are just at a standstill. I hate this. I want to move, whether it be forward or backwards, I need change. I can’t stand still and accept this. he fell asleep on me last night so we were unable to go out and tonight he made no reference into trying to get together but I did send him a text message this morning as per my sister’s friends advice. She said I needed to let him know that I was done trying to plan things and that the ball was in his court. This was our brief text message session about it:
Mike: Good morning sweetie. Sorry things didn’t workout lastnight. I fell asleep during kung fu panda.
Me: It’s ok but it seems you are pretty busy lately so I am going to leave meeting up, up to you. I don’t want to feel like I am nagging you.Mike: Please don’t do that. You aren’t nagging me.
So at least now he knows I am not going to say a word about it. my sister’s friend thinks he is married or dating other women which is why he never calls and only text messages. She feels it’s easier to text when you’re married without anyone knowing but a phone call is suspicious. I honestly don’t feel he is married or seeing anyone else because of the conversation we had on our second date but I do feel something is up. Like he isn’t really into me but likes the idea of having me around.
I hate this so I am just here. I am not backing off totally but I am not pushing either.
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